Sweet Serenity

I stand motionless in front of judges,patiently waiting to hear the first drop of musical bliss.

The stage beneath the soles of my shoes, ready to be trampled on, yet, graciously kissed.

My mind tries to ease into a comfortable state of thought, as if, enjoying a piña colada on the beaches of Lanai.

Muscles tense up while neurons fire at lightening speeds, at the same time, adrenaline seeps into my veins producing a different type of high.

I can hear my heartbeat as the audience begins to set their sights at the lit stage.

The sound of it beating gets louder and louder, all while my vision of the crowd fades.

The beat drops and it pierces my soul as if I got struck with an audible sword.

I pause for a brief moment before my body takes over, and completely demolishes this floor. 

There are no worries or struggles of my current reality I take on stage, as I make waves in an ocean completely free from guilt.

It took years upon years to fully enjoy the beauty of this majestic boat that heartache and experience built.

-MJR

5 things I learned on Camano Island

You always learn something when taken out of your normal routine! 

This weekend I had the opportunity to take a trip up north to this little place called Camano Island to teach a hip-hop workshop. I've never been there before so I decided to take the family up with me. We've been in contact for about a month prior to the workshop and it finally came time to make the drive up there. I didn't know what to expect but I knew once I got to the warm ups and 1st eight count what I was dealing with :)

My approach to every workshop is to be personable and make them leave feeling like they've conquered the world. See most choreographers teach to see their choreography on the students. I teach to see the student succeed in life thru choreography. There is so much we can teach about life thru dance. We can create great dancers but we have the power to create better human beings! Let me explain myself a little bit.

Camano Dance Academy is a small town studio with an enrollment of 500+ students. Wow! Talk about owning the town :)

We pull up to the dance studio surrounded by nothing but trees. I've never seen a studio nestled in the middle of a forest like this before but it's quite the set up. The kids start filing in one by one for the beginning class. Sarah Cooper (hip-hop instructor) comes in and greets her students and also new ones that are currently not enrolled in her class. She takes the beginning class and I'm  filled with joy seeing her dance with her kids. 

Here's what I've learned this weekend. It's nothing new but a great kick in the butt to make you realize to get back on track. 

1: BE EXCITED ABOUT YOUR STUDENTS! 

Meeting the students and Sarah put into perspective on how students should view their teacher. As a teacher, I talk a lot, but for good measure. Some students/parents can agree to disagree but I feel like dance class should also be looked at as dance literature. There is no correct way to "move" in hip hop so I deem it necessary to talk about it and give examples or lessons if you will in movement and expression. Some kids care less and continue to depend on talent while other kids soak up the knowledge and excel thru hard work. These kids came to soak up the knowledge and it goes to show that the instructor is doing a great job. 

2: CONTINUE TO TAKE CLASS

Instead of watching Sarah take a seat and watch class, she was right there sweating it out with the rest of us. Both in the beginning and advance class. Back to back she danced just as much as I did in the workshop and it just goes to show the students that you should never stop learning. Always grow in your craft. Whatever it is. There is always room to grow and learn. There were also other students who have since moved on from the studio and are in college that came back to take class. It's heartwarming to see past students come back to their roots. 

3: TRY NEW THINGS 

My style of choreography wasn't their specialty but the willingness and determination to understand and grasp the style was awesome to see. Trying new things or even being in a new setting is uncomfortable to say the least but when you attack it with a learning attitude, you succeed no matter what.

4: BE VULNERABLE

I taught a vulnerable piece and it did have some explanation in order to execute well. The recipe to a good dance is musicality and execution. With those 2 things, you really can't mess up a good dance. I taught "Love Yourself" by Justin Bieber and while most can't relate, some can, and it makes for a better visual representation. In order for us to understand what you are trying to convey on stage, we, as an audience need to feel your joy or pain. Be vulnerable enough to let us into your thoughts and emotions while you dance. 

5: LOVE WHAT YOU DO

At the end of the day, do you still love what you do? As a dance coach I'm able to say that with a smile. Though at times, kids can be a handful and some days just disrespectful to be totally honest, but we all fall short, amen?!? We all have bad days, but we have a lot of good days as well. What keeps us going is the satisfaction that we get from teaching and seeing the success that comes after it. Whether they continue to dance or take what they learned in your class and tackle this crazy thing called life. Being part of a success story is the gift that gives back, and that's why teachers teach. We love what we do because at one point, someone invested in us to be great thru the same platform, dance. It's a love that will always burn bright with passion. This weekend I was able to see that fire again thru the eyes of new dancers who've never experienced my personality or dance style. I saw it from an instructor who was able to take class and learn again. 

Tupac Shakur said it best.

I'm not saying I'm gonna change the world, but I guarantee that I will spark the brain that will change the world. - 2Pac 

Thanks Camano for reminding me that changing the world doesn't mean the earth as a whole, but changing the world of the person that lives in it :) 

Marc 

PS. Sometimes, the most important part of life is not what's in front of you, but who is still behind you :) 

Vacation Not Required

I've realized after taking a break for the last 4 days that I didn't need a vacation. I needed to REST! I needed to enjoy my family without interruption. See, many times we live our daily life and we're home but bombarded by work that we're not actually ALL there. It was good to be ALL there this time. I went to church and heard a great message. 

"Multi-tasking is a fallacy. Once we started to claim we multi-task, the quality in the things we do start to diminish. We are so busy doing more than 1 thing that our attention is divided and we sacrifice quality over quantity." (Paraphrase)

We, at some point need to rest. It's healthy. It's needed. It's important. If not, we get burnt out and the passion for something that once made us happy starts to dwindle. The past 4 days has been a game changer. It's allowed me to think more clear of what I'm passionate about and what I want for my future, for my wife and kids. The important thing to remember is that nobody else is living for you. They live for themselves. Do things that ultimately make you happy. Find new things that make your heart race with excitement. Find a new passion that jump starts a new journey. Above all else, believe in yourself even when nobody else thinks your worth it. They might not see you for what your worth but I know someone who thinks your worth dying for :)

(Matthew 19:26)

"But with God,all things are possible"

#DirtyThirty

In honor of my 30th birthday, I've decided to compile a list of 30 things that has helped me along the way and hopefully helps you at whatever stage of life you're currently at :) 

1. Love God- I'm currently on a train ride for Mothers Day enjoying all God created. Nature is beautiful and I love how God created things in such vast detail. Amazing!

2. Don't be afraid to try new things- Y.O.L.O ( you only live once) can't believe I just wrote that. But it's true :)  you should experience things at least once. Never be afraid of what you haven't tried. If you've tried it and are now afraid, then there you go. At least you braved it one time!

3. Don't take things too serious- life is too BIG and WONDERFUL to take serious. Enjoy it while you have it. So many times, people get angry over something so little and it ruins the rest of their day. Learn to adapt and use it to your benefit. 

4. Do You- many times people want to please other people for all the wrong reasons. It's best to just be yourself and the right people will come along and create life with you. Those are the lifelong pals you want around, not the ones that are only around you to benefit off you. 

5. Marry young-ish :) - If that opportunity arises, take action! Most think marrying young is a mistake but if you have solid ground and are both rooted in each other there is no shame in starting early. Life is best experienced with someone by your side to weather the storm as well as enjoy the sunshine.  If it's time, listen to Beyoncé and put a ring on it :)

6. Finish College- I never did get the chance to go back. I was so close to finishing my AA in elementary Ed when I realized it's not what I wanted to do. Then life hit and wasn't able to return. I would go back and finish it now but at this point it's kinda hard to make that commitment. If you can, finish early and enjoy the benefits of that piece of paper :)

7. Make time for family- when growing up, family can almost be a burden. We always want to hang out with friends. As you get older you begin to realize that family is important. Parents get older and you begin to think that they can go at anytime. So cherish those moments with loved ones because when they're gone, you'd wish you'd have been there to hug them one last time. 

8. Pick your battles- some arguments can be avoided if you suck up your pride and know it's not worth the breath. This goes for spouses and other outside conversations. People like to be right and will push you to be right. Bottom line, avoid the drama. You'll thank me later!

9. Acquaintances don't matter, friends do- throughout high school you'll have a lot of people you associate with and talk to on a daily basis. Then you have your friends that kick it with you everyday and know you better than your parents do. Those are the relationships you want to invest in. Later on in life it's much more about whose by your side  versus who likes your fb status :) 

10. Don't burn bridges- there are so many times we feel like we can burn a bridge and it won't matter. Later on in life we'll find out that burnt bridges aren't the way to go. Always end on a good note or at least cordial. You never know if you might need that relationship later. Definitely cut off negative relationships! However, while crossing new bridges, don't be quick to burn the bridge that got you to your next path. 

11. Live to Inspire- everyone wants to be inspired to start something or reach a goal. Inspiration is best when we admire the person that it comes from. The impact is long lasting and fulfilling to say the most. When you inspire the next generation, you create a world of endless possibilities for them to explore. Spark the change that you want to see. Lead by example :)

12. Be a role model- there is always someone who wants to be just like you. Whether it's your kids or your next door neighbor. Someone is watching your every move wanting to be your mini me. Be positive and encouraging. Listen and love who they are. Being a role model is tough work but we need great individuals to build up even greater ones :)

13. Drink a little- after a long week of working or inspiring individuals, it's nice to have a drink or 2 with some friends or even sipping something while unwinding in your living room ( juice or something non alcoholic for you tweeners lol) . Getting drunk is overrated. Casual drinking and having fun with a group of friends is way better. Plus you remember everything and aren't too hammered to hold an intelligent conversation. 

14. There's always room for dancing- I was reminded last night that there's always room for movement. Doesn't have to be perfect, just be free! Don't be afraid to fail. Be afraid not to try. Let yourself experience the joy of dance. Just move :)

15. Exercise- sounds like a lot of work while you're young but you're body will thank you by the time you're thirty! Love it! Stretch everyday and allow yourself to sweat more and more each day. Releasing those endorphins are great and get your day going on the right foot! Plus, it does a body good

16. Smile- need I say more? Studies show that the more you smile, the harder it is to have a bad day. Go figure!

17. Do at least one good deed a month- why not make it 2!!!! If you believe in karma, well, you'll have good things coming your way! Also, it just makes you feel good about doing something that's worth feeling good about! Sure going to the gym makes you feel good and eating that piece of cake. BUT nothing satisfies the soul than to watch someone light up with joy from something positive from you :)

18.Date with intention- I had a hard time with this one until I met my wife. Everyone was a cute face until I got my first real rejection from my wife. Dating with intention means that it's going somewhere other than to Dairy Queen for date night. You actually want to pursue this person for more than their body and your immature hormones. Marriage is a thought as well as a future with this person. When I figured that out, it was an uphill battle but I was ready for the climb! 

19. Read books- or at least listen to audio books. Knowledge is power and your mind is a very powerful tool in this life. Enhance your thinking, enhance your life :)

20. Save money- learn to save even if it's for a rainy day. I learned the hard way from various times of over-drafting in my bank account. Don't spend money if you don't have to. No one wants to wait for anything anymore. Everyone needs to have the latest thing. I promise, it's not worth the hype. Plus, a newer version is going to come out in the next 6 months and now your stuck with old news :(     save,save,save!!!

21. Run 5ks or 10ks- it's good for you! And they're fun to do. Sign up with friends and have the time of your life doing something fun and healthy! 

22. Have a hobby- nothing is more important than having something that your into other than your daily grind. Something that lets you release yourself and is freeing. Something you enjoy doing either by yourself or in a group. For me, it's bowling :)

23. Pamper yourself- we all need that massage or mani/pedi sometimes. Maybe even a lil shopping spree. It's always good to give yourself some type of pampering because let's face it. YOU deserve it!!!! 

24. Learn to cook- we live in a fast food world! People get super lazy and don't want to cook so they rather eat fast food. Here's 2 reasons why you should cook. It's healthier for you! (That's a big reason) and 2, it's quality time in the kitchen and with family if you cook together. It's more enjoyable that way too! Instead of standing in line thinking of what to order, you're trying to decide whether or not you should steam the broccoli or sauté it... Yeah I thought so.... Sauté it :)

25. Be patient- having kids has taught me a great deal of patience. I still lose it once in a while but boy do you have to have a lot of it. Teaching dance has also taught me patience. It's definitely something that we all need to work on but when you have a lot of it, getting through something that's super frustrating can turn out to be the ultimate reward when your patient and diligent. Practice makes improvement! 

26. Longevity is key- don't work multiple jobs for short periods of time. Work 1 or 2 jobs over a long period of time. It looks better in the long run plus it shows consistency as well as dependability. 

27. Don't go in debt- going in debt is inevitable. You have to go in debt to have good credit. If you can lower your debt and stay within 0-10% of your overall balance, you're good to go. Creditors say over 30% is too much. If you can pay in cash, DO IT!!!! If you have to go in debt over something like a credit card, chances are, whatever you put on it wasn't worth it! Pay cash!

28. Be proud of your culture- I'm proud to be Filipino! Be proud of where you come from. Learn your roots and who paved the way before you. You can learn a lot about yourself if you take a look at your past and the path that was blazed for you to be where you're at right now. 

29. Go on hikes- or just sight seeing in general. Living in Washington I've gone on my share of hikes. I wish I can go on more and soon I'll be able to :) the scenery out here is beautiful as we get the evergreen forest along with the luscious mountains that surround us. Enjoy nature. There is nothing quite like the vast picture the world paints everyday.

30. Love yourself- it speaks for itself. This should be number one on your list but sometimes you need to be reminded of this. You give yourself too little credit and should be walking away with your head high and heart full! Everything starts and ends with you. The beginning of your day until the end of it. It's all you! So love yourself throughout the whole process of life because chances are, while creating yourself, you'll find out more of who you want to become versus who you want to be like. It didn't take me 30 years to grasp this concept and hopefully it won't for you either :)

Peace love and blessings! Here's to my #DirtyThirty and everyone who is in my life to help me celebrate it! Love you all!

Reality Check

Do you ever sit and wonder what life would be like if you had made certain choices to change the outcome of your current situation? I sometimes get lost in these thoughts and quickly get a reality check. 

My reality starts at 330am mostly every morning and ends roughly around 9pm and some times 11pm most nights. I've always been a dreamer. A dreamer that will one day make his dream a reality. The truth is, it's a hard task to conquer. The war will always be passion versus commission. Until one day they see eye to eye and agree to coincide with one another. Until then, it's all about that American dream right? The hardest thing is to find something that you are so passionate about and make a living from doing it. For most people, it turns into a financial responsibility to care for themselves and members of their family. For others, it's what makes them happy. Can't you have your cake and eat it too? 

Let me be real with you for a second. For the longest time I've been a dance instructor while always holding a second job. When I was single it was a piece of cake being that I took care of myself and did what I love doing. When i got married, same situation. When Kingston was born my vision slightly shifted from Amy and myself to him. Now that Kensley is here, My vision has completely changed as I look into what our future as a family will be. From 2009-2011 I started and owned Expressive Dance Studio. My vision was to inspire the next generation through the culture of hip-hop, not necessarily owning a dance studio.  At that time I had no choice but to pave my own way. I sold Expressive to a company in 2011 with whom I still work for directing their hip-hop program and I'm also employed with Starbucks. 2 jobs with 60+ hours a week and a family of 4, the struggle is real.

While a good full time job will take care of both jobs financially, the question is, "will it make ME happy?" Ultimately, life is best enjoyed when the things we do make us happy. We all know how fast downhill that can go on a bad day. It sounds selfish to say I should do things to make myself happy instead of the family. But in reality, I'd be happier with the family if I love what I do day after day. Who wants to come home miserable to a family that misses you?!? On the flip side, how can you be happy when there's no money to pay for bills?!? My goal is to financially take care of the family while not missing out on my kids growing up. My goal has always been to be a business owner. What that looks like, I have no idea. What I do know is that I'm going to give myself one year to make this goal happen. To actually implement the process and find people on board to help out for this first year. I'm excited about this venture as I've never been one to do something like this. I won't say what it is but you'll know in due time.  

See, once in a while we need a reality check. Mine came from always missing out on family. Coming home tired and exhausted from working at Starbucks from 4am and getting done with dance around 830pm to going home and having to prep for dance the next day and hopefully getting 4 hours of sleep only to do it again. My body is exhausted. I've been working too hard while being too young  and just "getting by." Something needs to change. I'm not the type that works for a weekend to have with my family. Family has always been my 1st priority and that hasn't been the case lately and I need to make something happen. My dance kids mean the world to me. I can't give up dance just yet. 

When you get a reality check, you either daydream of what could happen or you start to plan out what happens next.

So here's to the rest of 2015 and the beginning of a journey that's going to be really exhausting and time consuming. Only difference is that I get to do it while my wife and kids are right next to me :)

What speaks to you?

Reflection

As the season changes, so does the view around us. We can say the same thing about life as well. When life changes, so does the view around us. Or, so does our view of life. You see, for some people, the view can be the same, day in and day out. For others, the view is so far ahead that their current view doesn't do it any justice. There's a saying, "there's a reason why the windshield is bigger than the rear view mirror. Where you're going is far bigger than where you've been."

It's true! The plans God has are far more superior than what I think I have planned out for my life. So, we just moved from a house back to an apartment to save in stress and just to be a family. This will be the first time in 6 years that Amy and I will have been just us instead of having people live with us. Now we're just a family of 4 in this nice 3 bedroom apartment. So much stress went into the move which I'm pretty sure God is up there smiling at our pain :) 

His timing is perfect. He makes things happen because he's that dope! I worked a shift at Starbucks yesterday but was sick through the whole shift so I got sent home early. THANK YOU Kevan for getting me out of there!!! I had some stuff to do for the house and my biggest concern was finding a house for Kalua because we can't keep him at our apartment. My boy Pete lives in Seattle and has a huge backyard and says that he can house him until my brother ( if he still wants kalua) can take him after he gets married. HUGE BLESSING as we took kalua over and he made himself right at home. It's hard to say goodbye but I see myself making some weekend trips in the future to visit my pup :) 

Kingston came with me on the roadtrip and he makes for a good partner in crime. He's a pretty fun kid to be around.

I've never taken King on such a long journey by myself but he did pretty awesome. It's funny, your dreams in life after having kids start to become based on their future instead of yours not because they have to but because you love them so much and want to give them the world! As I drove up to seattle last night, I had a lot of time to think about their future and what I'm doing to prepare both Kingston and Kensley and ultimately how I'm setting Amy up for success to be  a Momtrepreneur :)

The sad reality is that I'm not. I've been thinking for myself these past couple years. My dreams have to change from a single bachelor mentality to that of a husband and father of 2. They don't have to, but when you grow up, your mentality stops looking in the rear view and starts looking through the windshield. See my dreams are for my kids to have a better life and for my wife to live a more fulfilling one. These past couple years I've been doing it all wrong. Everything had to be fulfilling for me. When in reality, what fulfills me is to take care of my family because that's where my heart is at. Pastor Chris Harold once said" the object of your vision will determine your hearts condition." This is so true! My heart is with my family. It's always been there. I've just been looking at the rear view  for so long that my I couldn't see the bigger picture of my life.

We all need that time to reflect and just be still (psalms 46:10)

My reflection began looking through the windshield and noticing all God had made. My rear view mirror had a car in it :) 

It all starts with a picture, and that picture changes when you add life to it. Don't be afraid of the unknown. You don't know what you can handle until it's in front of you. If you fail, great! There's different ways to skin a cat (maybe that's the wrong analogy to make)

I say that to say this. Your future is very valuable. Your current view is everything in your windshield. In time, if you're moving forward, that view changes. It changes a lot. Embrace it and conquer it. Be selfless! It's time to see life through the windshield and wonder what next  instead of living in the rear view and wonder what happened. 

Love Life!

Learning from children

 I learned a valuable life lesson today that forever will change my outlook on life. 

I woke up this morning and put on my director/coach hat that I wear all the time (figuratively speaking)

I had to be at a highschool dance competition at 930am to help tech a group I choreographed for as well as my group who were exhibitioning 3 pieces. This is nothing new for me as I've lived this life for almost 10 years now. But the difference this year came when we were just sitting down in the black box (theater room) and one of my little girls asked to sit on my shoulders as I sat and watched the friendships begin to flourish within our group. "That looks funny, Marc is like you're dad!" Exclaimed another girl to the girl on my shoulders. Which her reply was "yeah I have a dad but Marc is like my 2nd dad!"

My world paused for what seemed like eternity but in reality was only 3 secs. Every negative thought I had about my career and why I do what I do went out the window today. I get it! I finally understand and can comprehend why I continue to do this line of work. I LOVE KIDS! I love mentoring and nurturing those pure souls! My method may be through teaching dance but I love that I get to teach them my own way and not conform to someone else's way. 

I watched these kids perform and the excitement on their faces when they hit the floor. I genuinely love my kids. Each one of them holds a special place in my heart. I mostly have all girls but I do have 1 boy who holds his own amongst the ladies :) 

After all of the performances, I sat in the empty black box thinking to myself how much I love what I do. How much I love the children that I get to invest in weekly and how much happier I am after watching them perform. Though this life is not for everyone, I find joy investing in this younger generation. I find happiness in their faces after a performance. I find beauty in the way they carry themselves on and off the floor. I love the feeling of independence when the kids can work out their transitions without you. 

After the performance, Kingston (my son) and I went to Starbucks for a daddy/son date and he ordered his birthday cake pop as usual :)

As we go to sit down, I realize that I don't have to help him up the chair. So I sit and watch him as he pulls himself up and begins to neatly place the pink bag on his lap and enjoy the ball of dough. I say to him "King, you are pretty awesome!" He replies "You're pretty awesome too daddy!" I begin to tell him how he teaches me everyday what it means to be a dad and that I'm glad that he's my son. He smiles and finishes his cake pop. 

I say all of that to say this. I see a lot of directors/choreographers miss the big picture. When part of a studio or dance team, carrying the title comes with a whole lot of stress that takes a very special person to overcome and turn it into a positive experience. Not a lot of parents will understand the relationship between a dancer and their coach but will understand the commitment necessary when their dancer is excelling in it. As a coach, our job is to train for success both on and off the stage. I feel the same way as a parent. Which leads me to say that I feel like I'm a dad to all these kids and my kids deserve the best. Not just 90% of me a week. But I'm dedicated to them 100% in class. Just as  I am dedicated to Kingston when we are together. 

Being a director/coach isn't easy at all. In fact it's more than that. I feel it's more like a life coach. It is you're job to prepare them for the future. Whether that is through dance or helping them through a problem. They look up to you. You have a lot of power in your words and actions. Don't screw that up! Be the light in their dark world. To some, you may be the only light they see in their week. Shine bright and shine often! 

I feel as if I changed dramatically during the last 3 months as I've been longing for something I thought that was missing. To be honest I just had to let go of those feelings and make room for a more positive outlook on things. People come and go in your life but the people that stick around and make an effort deserve to be there. Once the effort isn't reciprocated, close that door. It's all about the give than the take. Once all the junk is out of your life, you have more room for treasure. My current treasure rests in being a faithful servant. With God at the forefront of everything I do, I feel blessed everyday with the people currently in my life and the kids I get to inspire. God is awesome! I asked him what he wants me to do cuz I'm so lost and don't know which direction I'm headed in this crazy career life of mine. I love how he responded this weekend and assuring my heart how full it was after today. Thanks God :)