I used to think I was a man for having control of my life.
Thought I would be a better man for having a kid and a wife.
But let me say that those things just added glory to my name.
It didn't change who I was or the fact of being claimed.
I was disillusioned at the time to think that I was legit.
Making choices , spittin game, living my life and that was it.
Andthat made me a man, at least I thought it was that.
Being single r on my own I was the best one at bat.
And that's a fact cuz I had girls thinking I'm interested and all.
I was taken but that didn't stop me from flirting with them all.
And I fall easy, but its not easy just walking away.
I sat and prayed and convinced myself that this was OK.
But I was blinded by lust and thought I knew what love was.
Thought I was controlling my feelings but I forgot what that does,
Or what it felt like, man I just wasted my time.
I was never in control, but I thought I had to shine.
But for what? To prove my worth as a man?
Cuz first I had to grow up before I asked for her hand!
I had to man up, and not believe my own lies.
I said I prayed but the truth is it was me in my mind,
Telling me that I was right and everybody else is wrong.
Too much pride up in my soul to come off weak and not look strong.
I built a wall too tall for normal eyes to peer over....the other side.
Man I felt a part of me die.
When I didn't have someone on the other side to hug.
My heart broke thinking the man above showed no love.
But patience is a virtue and sin is a sin.
We can't sit and blame God knowing that we've been deceived by satan.
But to know this type of info doesn't come to surface overnight.
I had to fight and go thru trials to make everything turn out right.
Learn how to be an adult and conduct myself with integrity.
It takes a special person to bring out and expose the best in me.
Was I the right man? I thought God made a mistake.
How could he trust me with the lives of others to lead em straight.
I learned it was a blessing, God gave me wisdom and courage .
And the strength to take it on, he left me feeling encouraged.
So I leave you with these words the next time you feel like your the man.
And how no one can tell you different cuz you were brought up to make a stand.
And fight for what you believe in especially when it comes to love.
How weakness is nonexistent and strength becomes like a drug.
Thinking your on top of the world but can't take care of yourself.
And how the title you possess carries the weight on the shelf.
Without control your not a man is the lie that you believe.
So everyday you run the house like your the only one on the team.
Your not defined by how much they listen or how in line you keep your house.
But by the way you treat your kids and appreciate your spouse.
A real man remains clear while the other remains painted.
One you can see everything while the other remains tainted.
So the next time you say your a man and deserve the best
Just ask yourself a simple question...is it me that people respect?
- so many times we think that being a man means being in control and being in charge. OR having a title of authority we automatically should be respected. NOT AT ALL!!!!! Having things in life doesn't make you a man nor does a title or age! Respect comes from your ability to bring out the best in other people. Your ability to put one before yourself. People respect other people for reasons of adding inspiration to their life. So when you consider yourself a "man," more so an ADULT... do you conduct yourself in a manner in which you represent these qualities or do you just believe you possess these qualities due to your current status in life. Whatever that may be. Respect is delicate. And so are dreams. Don't ruin someone else's cuz it doesn't line up with yours.
Being a man requires becoming selfless... are you a man yet?
